Okay first, I hope no one is offended by the term "Nerdy Girls." I consider myself a nerd, and if there's any hope for me getting a girlfriend, I'd probably fair better sticking with my own kind.

I'd like to ask if any one has advice on good places to meet girls that might share my interests. I know that my LCS would be good, but I've never - EVER - seen a girl anywhere near the place. The only female I've ever seen there was the owner's Mom bringing him lunch (*snicker*).

And I'd also like to ask the married/committed members out there where they met there spouse/significant others?

I know most people are going to say, "Go to your local bar and hit on a Hood-Rat." Uh, no thanks. I don't drink (going to a bar would be false advertising), and bars seem like the kind of place you go to meet the WRONG kind of girls.

Additionally, some will say, "Go to a dance club and BUST A MOVE!" Sorry, I can't dance (don't ask me). And I just don't fit in to those sorts of places. This may sound a bit fantastic, but I think if I showed up at a night club/dance club, I wouldn't even be allowed in. I'd get STUDIO 54'd right at the door.

I don't know how old you are Tommy, but I know you're not as old as I am (57). I divorced my first wife in 1994 and did very little dating after that for basicly the same reasons you mention. Also while I'm a very outgoing person I have trouble picking up girls. I guess it's an inner shyness. I'm fine once I meet someone, but meeting them is hard. At any rate I just remarried this past October to a wonderful woman from China that I met on the internet. The internet has become the new dating place. If you give it a try my only suggestion is to be honest and to be yourself. My ad title was "Old, Fat & Ugly" and basicly said "think about it, when you were 18 and you met someone 56 you thought 'boy he's old' and when I was 18 I weighed 190 if someone told me that 40 years later I'd be pushing 300 I'd say 'boy that's fat' (and it is), and I don't know about you but when I look in the mirror the face looking back is uglier than the one looking in. There you go, old fat & ugly." My intent was to hopefully show my weird sense of humor and to describe myself in a real way. Well obviously it worked. I met and dated a few women from that ad. Most were a once and done thing, but I only needed to find one, and I did. Your woman is out there, and right now she's wishing she could meet someone just like you. All you have to do is find each other. Good luck.

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If you have your heart set on meeting a nerdy girl then there's no better place than your LCS. Get involved in some of the activities many shops have like card games or art/writing clubs. Another good place is the video game shop or just join a dating service where you can find just who you're looking for. I'm sure there's a nice girl out there with similar nerd interests as you. Best of luck to you, Tommy.

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My Pull List

Marvel: All New X-Men, Avengers, New Avengers, Uncanny Avengers, Uncanny X-Men, Superior Spiderman, Indestructible Hulk, Thor: God of Thunder, Guardians of the Galaxy.

DC: Aquaman, Batman, Batman: The Dark Knight, Detective Comics, Earth 2, Green Lantern, Justice League, Justice League of America, Savage Hawkman, Superman.

Dark Horse: Star Wars

Yeah, I do pretty good with nery girls, and - believe it or not - hot mamas looking for a meaningless hook-up. The problem is I can't seem to find one that's single, more within my age range, or lives anywhere near me.

I've had minor success getting to know some girls through YouTube (which isn't a dating site, I know), but they all live at least in a different time zone. That's where I met Chasity. But girls don't go on YouTube looking for a boyfriend...although stranger things have happened.

Someday, I'll get so lonely (and I mean that as a euphemism) that I'll break down a put a profile on match.com, or e harmony. I'm sure there are lots of nerdy, shy, wallflower type girls on there who are lonely (both the euphemism and actual usage) on there. In fact, just for gits and shiggles, I did a search on match.com, and found a girl I had a crush on in high school. I asked her out once, but she had a boyfriend at the time. Maybe now that I'm older, more mature (slightly), and much thinner...

Thanks everybody.

Here comes the advice that counters the original post.

Try not to think of yourself as incomplete simply because you're not attached to someone. I am guessing (not sure you could statistically back this up) that there are far more people unhappy in relationships than there are people that are happy in relationships. The reason I feel this way is because relationships are hard work. And not everyone is willing to work on them. Our society makes us feel as the we are abnormal if we are not involved in a relationship. I hate the stress people and media put on single people. The divorce and abuse rates are way too high to justify this kind of pressure.
Ultimately, what I am saying, is take your time. Its not a race. And know, that you have to work a little to meet friends. You said you don't like the bar scene because you don't drink.....don't worry there will be lots of people there who aren't drinking. You can't sit at home reading, or go for long lonley bike rides and then wonder why you can't meet that special someone. Make yourself seen outside of work.
And remember, don't push it. It always seems to come together when you least expect it to.

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Okay, I agree with every in this paragraph whole-heartedly. And trust me I'M NOT LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO COMPLETE ME! The truth of the matter is I'm 28-years-old and I've never had a girlfriend. I'm lonely...down there. And I am working: why do you think I'm asking for help finding places to meet girls?



Okay, that's where you lost me. People go to bars...not to drink? So you're telling me that a girl who abhors drunkenness as much as I do...go to bars to meet guys!!??

And DO NOT give me that "You gotta loosen up!" BS when it comes to drugs and alcohol. 'Cause you can my



As for "long lonely bike rides," half the time the bike rides end at places where girls go, like the mall or an ice cream shop where this cute little brunette works. And I think I was getting somewhere with her. And as for the "least expect to" piece, that's why I chat-up like 75% of girls my age I happen to meet.

Eh, Nerdy girls? My friends and I! So you can get an idea, I'll tell you where we hang so you can find a place nearby. One, I'm not a drinker either, so a bar isn't my place. Have you tried local conventions? We have one in San Antonio every two months, very low key, but a lot of guys and girls show up. It's not expensive, only 3 to get in, and you can hang and talk all day. Just do what you enjoy and remeber, the best ones come when your not looking. They run up, whack you on the head with a club and drag you into their cave of doom. So romantic!

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Uh...one. Not counting myself. She's rather nice. We got her into comics finally. She's a fan of Mystique, Scarlet Witch, and Catwoman. Big movie fan as well. She'd probably know any movie you ask about. The other three are taken, including BQ, sorry guys!

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Nope it's not that bad. Actually, it's closer to Sam's hair, in both color (which is natural sandy blond) and length. It would be longer in back, but when my hair gets long it starts curling, so it appears shorter.

She is exactly right, you can try to look for love, but you probably won't find exactly what you want, but love will find you. Thats how its always been for me.

Just get out and join the living, its summer time now, so there are plenty of options for you. Parks, Amusement Parks, Gyms, Swimming Pools, Sport Events, etc.......

Just don't pressure yourself like you HAVE to find someone, it will happen when it is meant to happen, just remember, don't be afraid to be yourself and it will all turn out good.

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