*Jim Nausia's Workout
The fitness program that will wipe you out.
1. Jumping Jerks: Jump up and down and act like an idiot. It won't help your body, but it'll keep the muggers away from you.
2. Spit-Ups: Sit up until you lose your lunch. At Grossville high that's the best way to stay healthy.
3. Push Downs: Get your body on the floor and stay there. The air their contains fewer pollutants and cancer causing agents.
4. Deep Knee Benz: Do enough of these and you'll get water on the knee and drown.
5. Aromics: Jog in place until your deodorant wears off.
6. Stretch: Tie your legs to a tree and your arms to the fender of your friend's car, then yell, "Peel Out!" *Source: Back of Card